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Recovery together or apart requires accountability, ability to look at one's self, a willingness to let go and forgive if staying together, or a willingness to rebuild trust in yourself and others if the relationship doesn't continue.

Dr. Boss reveals that resilience is especially important when there are no immediate solutions. This is often what intimate partner abuse survivors face: no immediate solution. Sometimes, coercive behavior continues even after leaving. Dr. Boss prescribes adaptability, flexibility, and tolerance for ambiguity. What do these mean for victims of intimate abuse?

Betrayal Trauma is a phenomenon that occurs when there is a violation of trust by someone whom we depend on for survival or to whom we are significantly attached.

Intimate partner abuse victims often search for therapists who help them recover from the emotional injuries they experience. The purpose of this blog is to guide both prospective clients and therapists toward treatment success.

Writing is a way to know ourselves. It eases us through unsettling times. A bonus: robust self-awareness provides guardrails against accepting coercive control.

There is a simple tool that helps many trauma survivors; simple but not always easy. So, ahead of time, give yourself wells of permission and patience.  

Grief is always a normal and important part of healing for intimate partner abuse survivors.

Relationships without trust are like trying to drive a car without wheels. It won’t take you to where you want to go.

None of us escape from the language of patriarchy. Increasing our awareness of sexist language releases us from unjust outlooks on men and women.

As we begin a new year, it's important to recognize that new beginnings include telling your own story.

Here are some questions whose answers offer clues about whether you are dealing with someone who is emotionally abusive. Proceed with caution and talk about it if you don’t like what you see.

After survivors learn the tactics of coercion and attend to their injuries, they can focus on how to respond in ways that empower them and disempower the controller. They do this by learning how to keep abusers’ blame, negation, and gaslighting from having power over them.  

Divorce is never easy, and that is especially true for intimate partner abuse survivors. My last blog, Considering Divorce, was a walk-through of the process. During my interview with Holly Slota, attorney at Pines Bach LLP in Madison WI, I asked what issues make it more difficult for survivors. This blog combines her responses with guidance on how to handle each issue.

Survivors, as well as those who work with them, will find my interview with Attorney Holly Slota from Pines Bach LLP in Madison, Wisconsin, informative. Those who contemplate leaving often feel fear about the unknown legal system, making an already complicated decision more difficult. Abusers often tell their partners information that is inaccurate because they want to manipulate or frighten them.

One of the most significant emotional injuries from intimate partner abuse is loss of self-esteem.

My guest blogger is Caron Kipping, a Divorce and Separation Coach in Great Britain and the author of "Recognition to Recovery."

Allies are the first pearl in the necklace of insight, hope, and healing. Victims know the difference between an ally and someone who has an agenda.

The term “victim” does not identify who anyone is, nor does it reflect on their worth. It denotes what happened to them.

Acknowledging what we don’t know represents strength when we use our curiosity and “inner scientist” to learn about it

I structured my book, Coercive Relationships: Find the Answers You Seek, around issues and questions I frequently hear from survivors and often from those who work with them.